Becoming the Buddha

Thich Nhat Hanh says that "Becoming a buddha is not so difficult. A buddha is someone who is enlightened, capable of loving and forgiving You know at times you're like that. So enjoy being a buddha. If you don't become a buddha, who will? 

When I had my first card reading from Yolanda, my 10th card was consciousness and Yolanda said to me, You are the fucking Buddha! 

Yolanda

I met Yolanda at our sound healing event at KBuddah. I was not in a great mood that night and I didn't really relax or connect with her at that event.

She was very nice and lovely, but I didn't really want to be there in the emotional place I was in. I just wanted it to be over so I could go home. I was crabby.

But once she started chanting, I started to cry. And then when she played a certain bowl, I cried. Then during certain lighter instruments, I was relaxed and okay. Then during the heavy bowl, I'd cry again. I was releasing something.

I had been crying a lot during the weeks around then because we had been doing a lot of recovery muscle work with foam rollers and golf balls and it was painful and I had been releasing a lot of old tension and emotions were coming along with it.

Everyone else loved it and hugged her and talked to her a lot at the event, but I just tried to be invisible and take pictures for the KBuddah social media and just get the night over with.

On the topic of social media, everyone was connecting with her on Facebook after that night. I tagged her professional page for our posts, but they all became friends with her on her personal page.

About a week later, I got a friend request from her on Facebook. Then when I posted about going to see Rocketman, she asked if she could join me. I was not expecting that at all

After we saw Rocketman, I met her the next day at the river in Geneva for a reading. It was quite illuminating and fun. I just went back today for a second reading. I am going to go to a sound healing next week to experience it in a better mindset. And I know we are going to have her back at KBuddah for more sound healings in the future.

Here are the highlights of my two readings:

Reading One

The issue that came up to work on in my first reading was abundance. The card was cool looking. He was a fat hippie with a lotus and a book and she talked about how I was creative and my issue was opening up to living a life of abundance and receiving.

My next card that was needed for my issue was change. Huge change is what's happening for abundance and creativity to manifest. I have to face my shit and pause and go through the change. Learn from it.

One of the biggest things I'm learning is pausing and breathing and not forcing the changes. I have to go through the turmoil. Letting go is going through, not going around. When you slow down and take a breath sometimes you can let go so much easier.

I've had that happen in my dreams. Sometimes I know I'm dreaming and I get uncomfortable in my dreams and I want to wake myself up. I used to yell at myself to wake up. I'd yell, wake up!!! Eventually I taught myself in my dreams to take a deep breath and slowly open my eyes and then I'd be awake in real life.

I need to do that in my waking life. When I get uncomfortable, I need to slow myself down instead of yelling at myself or yelling at other people or doing dramatic things as a way of trying to protect myself.

My next cards were all about not giving away my power, trusting myself, and not worrying about the past or reverting to old patterns.

Reading Two 

My issue was past lives or past issues. Letting go of the past.  One of my last cards was courage!! I can do this! I don't need to think about my past or things that I used to do or cling to past patterns. I can move forward.

I got a card that was ripeness, meaning now is the time. I don't want to wait until the fruit is rotten. I want to do my work now. I got the card of slowing down to enhance the issue. Which to me means exactly what my first reading told me and the signs that I've been getting from everywhere. 

I need to slow down. I need to listen to my body and myself more. I can't worry that other people think I need to push myself more. I know what's best for me.

I know that after months of pushing myself this winter,  I paid for it. It didn't help me; it hurt me.

I got the inner voice card. I know I need to listen to my inner voice more.

My attraction card was rebirth. This was my favorite card visually. It was dark clouds at the bottom with a lion coming out of it roaring and then a little joyful angel playing the flute coming out of that.

Yolanda said it was pain and darkness at the bottom and then you have to roar and get mad to come out of the dark place to be able to get to the joy. 

I feel like more rebirth is coming. It's unfortunate that the roaring and anger has to come to pull you out of the pain and darkness to get to the joy. But next time I need to come out of the darkness, I know I can roar and use my anger in a more productive way to get to the joy. 

I got the We are the World card, which she said is my way of using my creativity in service to others as part of my joy. 

My outcome of the issue was burden. This was fascinating to me. The outcome of past lives is burden. If I can let go of worrying about the past, I can let go of so much burden. That's so much of what I've been doing in my work with Khris in training. How so much of an entire level of my pain was able to disappear so quickly.  Pain that had been trapped in my muscles and had been a burden to me for so long.

The burden card pictured burden on top of burden on top of burden. Layers and layers of burden. 

Fibromyalgia is like the rebirth card. It's the dark place of pain and depression and fatigue and tightness and all of that. The anger is the work.  You do the work and roar with your training and crying and release of your pain in order to let that pain and anger roar out of your muscles and your body to get to the joy and release a layer of burden. And then you do it all over again. 

And you love and forgive! Again and again. Because you are the fucking buddha!~