Elasticity and Pranayama

When people think of yoga they think of flexibility. Flexibility is different physically for everyone, but being flexible is mental as well as physical and that's the more important lesson. Flexible in thinking. To be flexible in thinking we need to listen and let go. The more you let go, the more flexible you become and the more flexible you become, the more you let go and it doesn't matter how flexible you are. Who's on first?

Khris brought up the word elasticity today and how when you force your muscles and tendons to do things they aren't ready to do, you are actually making them lose their elasticity--that spring and recovery that makes them flexible and pliable!

Forcing anything makes things break. In Yin Yoga they compare it to taffy. If you try to force it to bend, it snaps. But if you warm it and massage it and go slowly, you can stretch it really well and easily.

Khris talked in his interview about basketball how strength and conditioning play a role in sports. Flexibility plays a role in anything we do physically. We want to have elasticity and flexibility so we don't hurt ourselves. Again, physical flexibility and mental flexibility.

We didn't have much time to talk during training, but as I tend to do, I thought about it a lot. With yoga, we have Americanized so much of it to make it faster because we are impatient and want it to provide cardio and strength benefits at the same time. Also, people tend to be competitive, which is anti-yoga and don't listen to their bodies or the cues and don't use props and force things. It's okay that things have changed. But we have to change, too.

For example, I think people need to be more flexible in the way they view blocks. Blocks are not bad things. Blocks are fantastic.  We should be more flexible in the way we look at props. Props came about to help us with alignment. Straps and blankets are awesome, too.

We talked about pigeon pose and how your hips should be square and you shouldn't necessarily bend forward. I know my yoga teachers have always stressed to stay up on your palms unless you are very flexible and can fold forward and still keep your hips square. They also recommend putting a block under your thigh to support your leg. In yin yoga, they have you on your palms for a long time and then you breathe and maybe move down if you can to sleeping swan and put your forehead on a block.

Square hips are very tricky.  Triangle, Pyramid and Warrior 1 are my most difficult poses because I really try to focus on keeping my hips square. I could bend farther into those poses if I let my hips shift, but I'd rather really keep the integrity of my hips and keep my chest open and focus on my breath.

I've always seen connections between my training and yoga, but I'm seeing them more than ever now. I take my yoga to training and my training to yoga.

Inhale, brace, exhale. That's the KBuddah Pranayama (breath regulation). It works great with back lunges and other training exercises and it works in yoga, too.

That Pranayama creates flexibility and elasticity and stability. Square your hips. Inhale, brace, and exhale!

Re-Revisiting Process: The Anti-Goal and Listening

I'm not very competitive by nature. That doesn't mean I'm never competitive, but competition is not my default position and it doesn't drive me. For some people competition is a great motivator and works wonders. It's just not what works for me. I have some theories as to why that is, but ultimately, it just is.

I'm an introvert so I don't have a lot of need for external approval. I know what I believe and like and want and what others believe and like and want for me doesn't influence me much at all. Actually, I usually don't even want to know. I want to be liked, I just don't want to be approved of. That's a subtle difference, but a big one for me.

I want to be liked for who I already am. If you like me because I've changed what I wear, what I like,  or who I am because of your influence, that's false and it is more hurtful than you not liking me in the first place. So my self-esteem doesn't go up if I do or wear things you say you like and then you compliment me.

Another thing that occurred to me about competition is that I was the tomboy girl in the neighborhood that played in the street with all the boys, but the boys never wanted the girl on their team so I would be on both teams all the time. I'd be the all-time pitcher or all-time runner or all-time something. So I never was really invested in which team won because I was on both teams. (It was the 70s!)

So when it came to losing weight, dieting and exercising, goal setting and competing, even with myself, isn't a big part of my process. It's funny when other people ask questions because that's the first thing they ask. What's your goal? Or how many more pounds do you want to lose? Or if I say I'm down to 190, they will say, 175 is next. I'm like, no, 189 is next. (And maybe it will be 191 and then 189 and then 192 and then 190 and then 189.)

Something dieters are prone to saying is that maintenance is the hard part or that losing is easy it's keeping it off that's hard. I think that is because they have been too competitive and too goal-oriented during the process and haven't just focused on the process.

My trainer often talks about process. Many people like talking to him, but not that many people actually listen to him. People tend to like to show off what they know instead of taking in new information or a different point of view. That's another case where I think I have an advantage as an introvert. I listen. That doesn't mean I agree with everything I hear or I change what I believe according to the new information I get. It means I listen.

If what I'm hearing doesn't line up with something I know about myself, I don't feel the need to interject that. For example, when Khris first talked about the fact that he didn't eat meat, I didn't feel the need to broadcast that I was not willing to give up meat or I didn't think it was necessary to give up meat or that I loved meat or that I didn't have the moral conviction about giving up meat. I just listened.

At that time, I wasn't ready to give up meat. I had no reason to do so. I had nothing compelling me to do so. It was part of my diet and I was able to lose weight with it. I ate small amounts. I liked it. I still like it. What's different now is that even though I like it, I don't feel that great after I eat it.

That is a compelling reason not to eat it. So I don't or I don't very often. I won't declare myself a vegetarian or vegan because I don't have compelling enough reasons to think that I will never ever eat meat again. I probably will. And maybe every time I do, I'll feel crummy and decide to avoid it again. Or maybe I'll have a turkey sandwich once a month and I'll be fine with that. But listening to Khris and the way he presented things and not fighting him allowed me to discover that on my own.

Just yesterday when I did my kettlebell swings, Khris asked me what I ate before training. He rarely asks me about what I eat, but he did yesterday. I had eaten a protein cookie. It was convenient and I didn't have any protein shakes in the refrigerator or any bananas or any almond milk for oatmeal squares cereal and I didn't have time to toast a bagel and have that with peanut butter.

I told him that I haven't been eating meat, but I've been eating all grains and I haven't been eating fruit or vegetables. I've been neglecting my smoothies and just eating brown rice or veggie pasta or peanut butter sandwiches on multigrain bread and eating protein cookies and Triscuits and snacking on BelVita biscuits.

He told me I should add some fruit and I could start slowly by just adding an orange and some grapes and adding a little jelly to my peanut butter sandwich. I did just that. I didn't try to think about long term or anything beyond just doing that little change for now.  I didn't fight with him about how I don't like fruit and I wish I liked more fruit and I hate the texture of fruit and lettuce. I didn't worry about why I could foresee problems adding more fruit consistently. I just did it. I did what I could.

He also told me when I left that I should stay home and not try to come to the Tuesday class if I was tired. It was like he knew that I needed that little bit of push to stay home. That permission.

I did. I stayed home. I slept in and this morning when I weighed myself, I was 179! I was under 180 for the first time ever, after hovering in the low 180s for over 2 months!!! I thought I'd never see the 70s. I wasn't worried about it. If I stayed at 180, that was fine. But listening and making a small change and allowing myself to rest was rewarded immediately.

Focusing on the process is the goal. The process never ends. The process continues forever. So maintenance and keeping the weight off shouldn't be any more difficult than losing the weight if the focus is the same. Losing weight wasn't easy, but it seemed easy because I was never focused on an end goal. I was focused on the process. I focused on the small changes over time.

I never got mad at myself or frustrated or thought I was failing. I never felt like giving up or pigging out or thought it wasn't worth it. Back in January of 2017, I decided to start focusing on living in the present and not in the past or the future. That was 2 months before I even decided to lose weight. I think that change in mindset served me well in my decision to lose weight.

I'm always in training. Process is a better goal than any goal you can have because it is always the same goal. You don't have to update your goal. It's self-updating. The updates reveal themselves along the way if you open your eyes, your ears and your heart and listen.


Previous Posts about Process: the Anti-Goal:

Revisiting the Anti-Goal-Next Level Shit

Process: The Anti-Goal 

My Trainer Gets Happy for Me!

Training is still the best thing that has happened to me in the last year and my trainer is the best person, friend and surprise to come into my world in a long, long, time. We have become friends and that is a great thing in and of itself. But this blog is about training. And I'm still surprised at times by how Khris gets happy for me and the progress I've made.

I forget sometimes and I wonder if I should be stronger or better at some things. My pushups are not very low. I get out of breath easily sometimes. My rope work isn't always the greatest. But I never do things half-heartedly. I give it my all in training.

In the classes, I have to pace myself, but in training, I give what I have. I listen. I pay attention. I try my best. I never want to disappoint Khris or myself.

When I think of trainers, I think of the stereotypical push, push, push. Khris is very demanding in the best way. But he is also so good to me. He told me today that if I need to skip class tomorrow to rest, that I should do that. I don't need to come just to feel "accomplished". I've been doing something every day for the last few weeks.

During training today, he asked me how many kettlebell swings I thought I could do if I really pushed through them. I said 40. He said he thought I could do 50. I tried and I doubled over and dropped at around 48. Tonight he texted me and said that was the highlight of the day. That he was so happy about that and I have come so far.

That was a great reminder to me. I forget sometimes that I have made a lot of progress. I forget that I'm not 20 years old anymore and I was really, really out of shape and sick and tired and in terrible pain and couldn't even get up off the floor without help. It feels really nice to have someone be happy for me.

Thank you, Khris, for being compassionate. Thank you for being demanding. Thank you for being attentive. Thank you for being creative. Thank you for being observant. Thank you for being mindful, passionate and diligent. And thank you so much for being happy for me.

KBuddah Training: My Trainer’s Thoughts on The Warriors, LeBron and the NBA Finals

My trainer, Khris Argue, is a sports fan as well as a trainer. He enjoys watching collegiate sports, wrestling, basketball, football, and baseball as well as playing Ultimate Frisbee and recreational basketball.

He likes a wide variety of teams for a wide variety of reasons, including traditions, energy, logos, and fans. He is a a fan of the LA and California teams in general, but who he shows interest in changes according to players, not cities.

Right now, it's NBA basketball finals time. Khris has a California team in the finals that he loves: The Golden State Warriors. Even though he thinks the Cavs may win the championship, he wants the Warriors to win. He likes the entire Warriors team, even the bench.

If the Warriors weren't in it, he would want LeBron to get it. But he said because of the Warriors, he can't care about LeBron winning, he wants the Warriors to get it.

If the Cavs do win, Khris believes that coaching will make the difference. He thinks that poor coaching in game 1 prior to the overtime, when the players were emotional and rattled and needed to be rallied and focused, was a big factor in the Cavs not being able to regroup and shake off the mistakes.

Khris has tremendous respect for LeBron and what he has brought to the game of basketball. The word Khris used to describe LeBron's gift is adaptation. His monstrous abilities physically and mentally and his approach have changed everything.

People calling him a crybaby or a flopper is a direct result of his adaptation to the league because he plows through everyone and nobody can run into him with the same type of force because of how he is physically perceived so he has had to adapt.  LeBron can also play every position on the floor.

Khris also admires LeBron's character and called him the definition of a perfect human. He is a people person who doesn't flaunt his wealth and gives back to the community. You don't hear about scuffles or any garbage with LeBron. He speaks his mind. He's confident and matter-of-fact.

Someone once told Khris that training, strength and conditioning, have nothing to do with shooting baskets. As a trainer, Khris took a bit of exception with that philosophy.

He explained that strength and muscle work affect durability, precision, agility and stability. Conditioning affects how long you last. You know what's asked of you. It's your endurance. It's how you pace yourself and when you turn it on.

This is the first year that I've watched the basketball finals since I lived in Chicago and was watching the Bulls and listening to the fireworks outside my apartment. It's fun to get into sports again because I'm working with my trainer. I am enjoying getting to know some of these players and teams.

Based on verbal interview with Khris Argue on June 4th, 2018 

Get to know my trainer a little better. Read another interview with Khris.

Check out my trainer's website! 

Absence Makes the Heart Grow Fonder: Namaste

Breath, Pain and Serendipity

Training today was so much fun after being away from Khris for 10 whole days, while he was on vacation. I still worked out and did yoga while he was gone, but training is different.

Breaks are always helpful to put things in perspective and to give people fresh starts. This was the first time I had a break from Khris since last August. I missed him like crazy even though we still texted a little and posted on social media.

We had a good training session. I usually just do what I'm told and I don't ask a lot of questions or say a lot. But I remember once, Khris told me to ask him questions and tell him what's going on. I just don't like to complain or make it seem like I'm trying to distract, delay or lollygag.

Breath

Today we focused on some breathing with some of the movements and how it helped. I needed to inhale, brace and then exhale. I mentioned how I have bad breathing technique in yoga. When we are supposed to breathe into the belly, I have a hard time getting the breath down there.

As I demonstrated while explaining, Khris saw the problem right away. I try to inhale and then get the air to reach my belly. It doesn't work that way. You have to start your inhale from the belly. I still need to practice, but that helps me now. The way they explain it in yoga and meditation, confuses me; it sounds like they want the belly to rise last.

Pain

It's the little things. It's always the little things. Then he had me do several exercises and instead of focusing on the usual things, he focused on the breath. The inhale, brace and exhale. Clever, he is! During one exercise I mentioned where I felt the pain in my elbow. I knew he knew I had been icing my elbow.

He told me to keep icing it and to even use heat and knead the tendon when it was warm. I'm not a stranger to pain. It's interesting to have pain that is localized and has a cause. We talked about pain associated with training. He talked about how he trains us like athletes. That icing and foam rolling are good things to address the pain.

Not all pain is to be feared or babied. This kind of pain needs to be addressed. If you leave it alone, it gets comfortable. By icing it and heating it and kneading it, you're telling it that you don't want it there. You're telling it to get out.

We talked about some stuff I do in the classes. He has helped me get through the classes in many ways. These classes are different from the classes I was used to at my gyms or on DVDs. They are more training based and less follow the rhythm and pace of the instructor based. I was used to following steps.

These classes are circuit based and do one minute of things and don't have steps or rhythm at all. I have had to figure out how to pace myself because I tend to follow the music and sometimes that makes me go too fast, so  I have been using light weights. Khris told me today, no more light weights. He said use the 8 pound weights instead of the 5 pound weights and just follow my own rhythm.

He said if I have to take a break, take a break. If I have to go to half the beat, go to half the beat. I need to make up my own beat and inhale, brace, and exhale. If I pay attention to the inhale, brace, exhale, I can go at any rhythm and still be okay.  That's how you get better and challenge yourself.  I've added a riser to the step. Now I need to add extra weight. Just add extra little bits a little at a time.

That's the way I've attacked everything over the last year and a half. Just taking things a little at a time. Adding and changing things a little at a time. It really is the best way that makes things change and stay changed for the long-term. I really have felt so at ease during this whole process. I have felt confident. I haven't felt tortured or worried that I would backslide.

Serendipity! 

When Khris returned I had a gift for him and he had a gift for me. We both gave each other crystals. Stones. And we both had the information about the stones for each other.

Namaste: the light in me honors the light in you!

Even though I didn't go on vacation, I feel the light from your vacation, Khris! It's so good to have you back and I'm looking forward to summer with you! 

Sensitivity

When I'm in yoga i realize how much we are in need of being aware of and using our senses better in our current culture and times. We are a very visual culture but we are also a very overloaded culture. We are the culture of multitasking and the culture of over-sensitivity.

It's ironic for me to talk about being oversensitive because I am extremely sensitive. But my sensitivity is a different type. I'm sensitive in the true sense. I am not selfishly sensitive in the sense of being offended about things and thinking that society should be tailored to my needs and wants. I think that's what people mean by sensitive now.

I am sensitive as in emotional.  Sensitive to feelings, sensitive to my surroundings, sensitive to sounds, sensitive to smells, sensitive to pain, sensitive to words, sensitive to light, to textures, to conflict, to stimulation, to provocation, proximity and intensity.

I believe the senses that we are under-using, underestimating, and undervaluing  to some degree are sound, smell and touch. We have lots of sounds surrounding us, distracting us, even assaulting us, but the lack of sound and soft sounds are missing. Even in yoga, people seem to always want music. That was one of the first questions one of the students asked the new yoga teacher when she arrived--did she ever use music.

She does use it, but only at the beginning during the slowing down of the breath and at the end during shivasana. During the practice, there is no music, and I love it. It's not necessary. There is enough to do just listening to her cues and focusing on the breath and the movement and how we feel. Once you have done the class a few times, you don't even notice that there is no music. The silence is part of the beauty of the class.

Then when you're in shivasana and receiving the benefits of the practice you just did, the music is even more relaxing and special. It's not just background noise that has been there all along. It is deliberate rhythm and chanting sounds to help you relax, release and ground yourself.

I feel the same way when I hike. I never use headphones when I'm in the woods hiking. The silence and the sounds of nature are the music. Music is nice for the gym or classes, but out in nature, nature is the music. We are surrounded by so much noise from the news and even social media and internet input, that lack of noise is more important than ever now to help our brains realize that everything is not so awful or urgent or desperate all the time.

Smell is something that is very underestimated. When I was teaching, I was very deliberately attentive to smells in my classroom. Sometimes it was with inexpensive gel air fresheners. Sometimes it was with the melted wax warmers. The smells were something that was commented on as much as my decorations.

I had students from other classes come in my room all the time and just inhale and say how it smelled so good in my room. I used fruit smells, in the spring and at the beginning of the school year when it was still summer. I used warm vanilla and spice smells in the fall and hot cocoa smells and cinnamon smells in the winter.

One year I had those pine cones that smell like cinnamon in baskets all over the room. I had many boys come and hold the pine cones to their noses and smell them every day before class or during class. When I would tell them they could take one, their eyes would light up and they would put one in their backpack.

Our yoga teacher puts essential oils on her hands and walks around during shivasana and holds them above our noses. We breathe them in. Then she pushes our shoulders down. That small event is something I look forward to every class. When she comes around. I take a deep breath to inhale the beautiful scent.

That touch is wonderful, too. Hands on adjustments are such a pleasant part of yoga. People are so afraid of touch now with all the inappropriate touch, that real, appropriate and loving touch is so lacking in our culture.

I was never afraid of touching my students appropriately. I know what appropriate is and so do they. They needed it. I grew up in a family that didn't touch. It's something I lack. There are ways to show love and compassion without touch, but touch is an important sense that needs to be used.

There are people who are really very natural and good at it. I've had several yoga teachers who were good at it. My trainer, Khris, is very good at it. There are ways to incorporate touch into your life. Yoga, massage, baking, crafts, art, petting animals, dry-brushing, crystals, manicures, pedicures, skincare, haircare, etc.

Maybe I need to reframe the word sensitivity and think of it as awakening my senses. So instead of thinking about how I am overwhelmed by certain things and I am too sensitive, I should think about what other senses I need to enhance and awaken so that I become more balanced and less overwhelmed and perfectly sensitive.

Jumping for Joy: My Trainer is Tricky!

The other day while waiting for yoga, I was witness to the cutest thing ever in the training area. Khris was training an older lady and he told her he was going to have her do one box jump. First he had her do step ups on the step with several risers. Then he took the risers out and just left it really low.

He talked her through it and stood in front of her. She asked if she could hold his hands. He said yes, but told her she wouldn't need them. She jumped, but she really just stepped up one foot at a time really fast and they both laughed. Khris said, I held your hands for that!?!

She walked back behind the step to try again! He talked her through it and she did it. She said, that was loud. He said, yes, but you did it. She walked back behind the step to try again! He talked her through how to land lighter. She did it. And it was lighter.

She walked back behind the step to try again! He told her a few things, but she just tried again and it was even lighter. They were both smiling, laughing and talking, and I was smiling watching. I had just watched him trick her into doing 4 box jumps when he said he just wanted her to try one.

I was smiling because it was so adorable, but also because I recognized his trickery! I have been a party to that trickery!!

When I first signed up for training I told Khris that I couldn't do anything high impact. I remember being worried that a trainer would push me too hard and I wouldn't be able to handle it. Back then I was very fragile in every way that you can be fragile.

In all honesty, even when I wasn't in the most pain in my life, I never liked high impact things. I never liked jumping. The only high impact thing I ever liked or did was with forward motion. I loved sprinting and hurdles. But I never liked anything with jumping from scratch like in volleyball or jump rope or jumping jacks, etc.

The only time I seemed to be able to do high impact things was in water aerobics or on the mini-trampoline. I need some kind of cushion or something. Anyway, I'm getting distracted.

I remember the first thing Khris tricked me into doing was the burpee. He started me with the BOSU and had me step back and jump in. He talked me through it the way he talked that lady through her box jumps. He talks you through it in such a way that you can't even think of not doing it. You just do it.

You do it no matter how much you think you don't want to do it. You do it no matter how terrible it turns out. You do it again because you want the first awful one to get better. Then you do it again because you realize you can do it even better. Then Khris will give you a modification or something that will make it turn out even better.

For me and the BOSU burpee, that modification turned out to be making my feet land far apart-wider. It wasn't as pretty, but it helped me land steady and feel confident and made them fun. It made me want to do more. And just like that, I was doing burpees. Damn. He tricked me!!!

I still can't find whatever it takes to do the burpee with my hands on the floor. I can't propel myself back. I can do it with my hands on a step or on a BOSU, but not with my hands on the floor.

But he still tricks me. He tells me I can and to just land short. I hate them. But I try. I will get them somehow. It will probably take me a year or so, but I'll get them.

He's tricked me into doing jump squats. He's tricked me into doing box jumps. He's tricked me into doing mountain climbers and jogging. But I trust him. I know he wouldn't trick me into something if he didn't think I could do it.

One day he walked back to the training area with a jump rope in his hand. I didn't say anything and we didn't do anything with it. But I haven't forgotten that. Maybe one day I'll be jumping rope for joy! Even just for one jump!