Walking tall!

I am walking tall into 2018. Literally and figuratively. No more Snoopy vulture posture for me. I am walking tall and proud. I am learning to love myself in ways that truly allow me to stand tall and shed more than pounds.

On the very first day I met Khris, he talked about how he would work with me in training in ways that would help me from the top down. He talked about the bump on the back of my neck and how my head would eventually come up and sit on top of my spine instead of so forward. I remember being intrigued by that. He didn't talk about losing weight, he talked about my head on top of my spine.

He hasn't mentioned that since the first day, but whenever he does talk about our training, he never mentions weight. He says I'm getting stronger or he tells me I'm working hard.

Today when I was putting lotion on myself, I just happened to glance in the mirror and I noticed that the hump on my neck seemed like it wasn't as pronounced. I didn't know if I was imagining it or not.

I asked Khris what he thought when I got to the gym. He said it was definitely bigger when I first came. He said it was the rows and other things he's been having me work on. He said my posture is way different. I'm more confident. I'm stronger. I hold myself different.

I really thought that hump was something biological. I thought it was skeletal. Apparently, I can work on it. I can help make my head move back on my spine and my chest move forward and stand taller. I know I carry my stress in my shoulder blades. I have knots there that have spasmed before. Massage therapists have commented about my cement muscles and my knots. I know my sensitivity is housed in my muscles.

That's the biggest surprise of my training. Not that I'm getting in shape. But that I'm digging into muscle and releasing pain and stress and whatever else is hiding in there and it's a fibromyalgia miracle treatment.

So I am walking taller now. But I am walking taller figuratively, too. This year, right in the nick of time, my life coach helped me learn that I really can be myself and not worry about what other people think or say.

It's easy to know that intellectually, but to really believe it and live it isn't always as easy. For some reason, people seem to always tell me that I should try to back off a little and not show my big heart to people for fear that it may scare them off or it may be too much for them.

If I have to back off in order for you to like me, then you are not worth liking. If you want me to back off, then I don't want you to like me anyway. If you like me, then you get my big heart. You get me. I accept all of you. You should accept all of me. Or I'll back way off.

I'm walking tall. Can you dig it?